Twas the night before the holidays, when all through the city,
thieves were still prowling, so we thought we’d be witty.
Because cars were being parked in lots and on streets,
with packages nestled on their front and back seats.
Shoppers were hustling from boutiques and malls,
heading back to their cars, still parked in their stalls.
They were loaded with lots of boxes and bags,
Some gifts were wrapped, some still had tags.
Out on the beat, with my partner beside me,
looking for crooks, our new GeoDASH to guide me.
Patrolling the streets, the lots and the malls,
a routine night, just taking some calls.
We sprang from our squad car after hearing a smash,
into a parking lot we went in a flash.
Our flashlights in hand, not sure what we’d find,
you can only imagine what sprang through our minds.
The glass from the window littered the ground,
leading us straight to the crowbar we found,
when what to my wondering eyes should appear,
but a little masked bandit with a smirk and a sneer.
He was dressed all in black, from his head to the floor,
and his clothes were all tarnished with glass from the door.
The gifts from the car he had flung on his back,
and he looked like a peddler just closing his pack.
He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
and filled his pack, then turned with a jerk.
Wiping the sweat from the bridge of my nose,
I gave him a nod, and out of the car he dove.
With sneakers and a backpack, he was lively and quick,
I knew in a moment that this was no trick.
Just like greased lightning, he made for the door,
But he skidded and slipped on the glass on the floor.
“Stop, police!” I shouted, and called him by name,
it wasn’t this thief’s first time playing this game.
With a click and snap his handcuffs went on,
the presents went back, nothing to pawn.
“You have the right to be silent!
You have been arrested for stealing!
You may call your own lawyer!
He’ll hear how you’re feeling!
Into the wagon!
You’re going to jail!
We’ve got more criminals to catch,
and we shall not fail.”
Like dry leaves before the wild hurricane fly,
We were back in our squad car, waving goodbye.
Back on the street, to the next call we flew,
so many to catch, if only they knew.
“Don’t leave valuables in your car,” we exclaimed as we drove out sight.
“Safe and happy holidays to all, and to all a good night.”
Vancouver Theft-From-Auto Statistics
- in the last 28 days, there were 1,181 theft-from-autos in Vancouver
- over 70% of those thefts resulted in a smashed window
- 20% of the vehicles were left unlocked
- in most cases, items were left visible in the vehicle
Items Commonly Stolen
- camera equipment
- ski equipment
- backpacks / briefcases
- cell phone chargers and accessories
- GPS units
- dash Cameras